How long did you not have sex with your wife or gf?

[allyyong]

I sms my hubby two days ago that we had not have sex for 2 weeks...he replied by saying it had only been two days, but to me it felt like 2 weeks...

Even with that, I still need to pleasure myself everyday....sigh!!!!Why he can't be more affectionate? Even as I am surfing now, that asshole is doing something on his other laptop.....

[john99]

It appears that not only the men are complaining abt the lack of TLC , it appears the women are starting to make their voices heard too.

For those guys who think I am a teacher/lecturer, no I am not any of these and I am married ( though not to Singaporean) dated locals before I was married though. Think honesty and openess is important for a marriage to work. If you are in the mood for TLC, make the effort as though u are still going on your first few dates. Otherwise cannot blame the women or the men for not responding to yr amorous gestures!

As u get older, it is the quality time u spend with yr partner not the number of orgasms u have.
To those guys who are feeling frustrated/ angry.. dut to lack of TLC from wives, I could empathise with you as my wife too work long hours and genuinely tired to do anything after a long day but we make dates on weekends to catch up. Send the kids to babysitter/ parents/aunties and relive yr the romance again.

Dinner at a decent restaurant followed by dirnks at pub and then back home for some action..

[tobby]

Well...if only all the hornies can marry each other. By the way, i think my problem is tentatively on shelf as my libido has decreased after i started on a diet pill 2 days ago. Not that i am fat but just want to shape up a little.

[sundial]

Originally Posted by ultra88man

Hi Bros and Sisters,

There are many reasons for lesser sex in years to come, this is fact, may the reasons come from the males or the females. No questions, it will affect the relationships. In my humble opinion, the best way to counter failing sexual, or should i say, no-sexual, relationships is still communications. Talking, not shouting or quarreling, solves many problems and misunderstandings.

Sorry for being loh soh .. cos i felt like sharing this .. hoped it helps some people in SBF ... because personally, sometimes, some advice from no where helped me think before action. I hoped I also can help others.

cheers !!!

communications cannot resolve my sexual need. only fun and exciting sex does.

[sundial]

Originally Posted by vistaman

i faced the same situation too. i bought my wife an Omega (birthday)and a LV bag (anniversary). She commented that it took so many years before i bought her. i was damn hurt man!!! its only the last few years that my career had gone on track and allowed me to buy things which i normally would not buy. What did she get me for my birthday or annivesary. Nothing! Zero! Kosong!!

Like u, i now spend on my kids and live for my kids. wish i had a GF though.

well i dont buy expensive stuff. coz she will only be happy for 5 mins then forget about it. Buy flowers got to throw it away for her when it dies
sometimes really fed up. when I not go out with friends keep calling me, go overseas keep saying miss me etc. but when i am at home totally bor chap
Really pissed and pend up

[asdfghjkl]

Originally Posted by john99

I could empathise with you as my wife too work long hours and genuinely tired to do anything

if wife stays at home, not working, and no TLC ler.. how?

[jaclyn]

Originally Posted by klzombie

Sis Jaclyn,

Your case seemed like those classic young boy and girl did the wrong thing by having sex without precautions and family forced marriage on both of you.

Sorry to hear abt it, my fren... I am a blunt and honest person. I have this impression, your husband didnt want to have a marriage this early with kids or havent even consider marrying you in hte first place when you were in a relationship. The fact became clear as he no longer have much interest in you after marriage (its a man thing, the guy wants to hunt and when its his, he may take it for granted, he has yet to realise the importance of you a shis wife) and that he is frustrated and blamed you and the baby for his current predicament.

Now, before I offer my opinion, I must first ask and warn you: Do you REALLY REALLY love your husband AND is he REALLY worth your love? If your answer is YES on both count, then pls continue to read on.

At this point, a guy usually does not take sex as a priority towards his wife (he however may be eating out) but more on trying to get his life back on track, meaning get more money and less frustration. Unfortunately, his frustration stemmed from your marriage. You can't do much here EXCEPT to make things easier for him, make him comfortable when coming home (not sex, but maybe cook before he comes home, clean the house etc) and make sure to take care of the kid, dont let the kid cry alot etc or your husband will get irritated.

Next, you must show clearly to him that despite the fact you are working too, he is still the 'man of the house'. He may be feeling inferior at the moment. This may even be caused by the fact that he cannot fully take care of the family financially (I am assuming he is a white collar since he works on shifts instead of 9 to 5..).

And this is IMPORTANT: Although your man may not be much interested in sex, you need not make too clear a point that you wanted sex. Wear something sexy (you dont need a sexy black lingerie from Victoria Secrets really), something simple will still do the trick like wearing sleeveless without bra, wearing shorts at home and do cleaning. Always make sure you don't look dirty or hair in a mess like some aunty. I tell you, the slight impression or indication is even better then full request for sex. A man usually will see a girl wearing sleeveles in shorts with hair tied back hanging laundry sexy then a girl asking for sex in the night when he wants to sleep. Also, SMILE! Its important to show that to throw away worries your husband have...

Well, thats what I can think of at the moment....

Now, there's another part of my opinion but this only involve the event if you feel that you dont Really love him that much and he is not worthy of you, then read on:

Frankly, I am of the opinion that such husbands have more chance of turning traitor to his wife then going back to being a nice husband. The chances of him running away with another girl, eating outside or started to become violent is higher then he became nice nice again (this depends on how long you guys have been married, the longer the frustration, the worst it gets. The man feels he is in a black hole of no return..). I would advise in this case, that you better ensure you become financially sound to support your kid if your husband dissappear one day... I'm sorry to say this but it is a possibility you cannot disregard.

Better to start looking at your own future then wait until something happen.

Well, thats my opinion and you are welcomed to your choice, in fact the choice is always yours to begin with. Good luck!!

tks bro klzombie,
well first of all i dun normally cook.. cos i'm staying with my parents... so oso cannot dress sexy at home... actually yesterday had a very bad quarrel with him... that he nearly went back to his mum's place... but he called me during the evening & he came back at nite...

actually my mum got worried too & being those typical aunty she went to the temple & pray... actually the so call "shifu"(priest) said that he's having an affair... cos of i confronted him.. but he juz denied... now feeling confuesed & hurt... wondering shld i check on him... or shld i juz keep an eye close... but i juz can't keep it all by myself...

[jaclyn]

Originally Posted by BustLover

Sister Jac, let me give you some advice for your consideration. They are:-

a) At all times, upkeep yourself well. By that, I mean, maintain your shappy body, your look and your dressing. Don't think that, "Oh, I am married and at home, just wear shabbly will do."

b) Change your hair-style, sometimes long hair, collar hair etc. Basically, make yourself look refreshing...

c) Learn to cook delicious food. When you can cook your man will like to come back for meal.

d) Don't make yourself cheap by taking the initiative. Sometimes, you have to play hard to get. There must be some element of surprises.

e) Try doing things together and get involve in his activities.

f) Start and build your own saving. You won't know when you have to stand on your own feet!

tks bro BustLover for ur advice.

a) i dun think i can maintaine shappy lor.. cos aft birth i've put on some weight... but of cos other asset gets better too... as for dressing up i'm trying my best now...

b) ya.. already think of changing the hairstyle when my pocket permits...

c) sad to say... i can't cook & i dun cook at all

d) dun really knw how to play hard to get... as he dun even ask for it... afraid that he'll look for other gals for sex i'll normally ask for it lor...

e) he dun even have time for me & our child... he only wans to go out with his frens... if i dun let him go he'll juz vent his anger on me

f) how to save... paying his bills for him... haiz...

[Rainman]

Originally Posted by john99

Dinner at a decent restaurant followed by dirnks at pub and then back home for some action..

Last time we did that, she came home tipsy...

So u say what happened??

[seesea]

Wah .. just read from 1st pg to last , although not in a day ...
Mine , no wonder our little country is not getting bigger in size but is going in the opp direction !!

Makes me wonder , is it just s'poreans females or is it our life styles that causes this (low sex life)

Once had a gf (indonasia) whom we met during sch days... almost always denied sex during courtship but can strip + touch, promised that when married , can let me do it anytime , as and when i wan as it's the duty of the wife to her husband ----------- Wonder does most local females feel this way too ?? Duty of wife to husband ...

[Rainman]

Originally Posted by seesea

Wah .. just read from 1st pg to last , although not in a day ...
Mine , no wonder our little country is not getting bigger in size but is going in the opp direction !!

Makes me wonder , is it just s'poreans females or is it our life styles that causes this (low sex life)

Once had a gf (indonasia) whom we met during sch days... almost always denied sex during courtship but can strip + touch, promised that when married , can let me do it anytime , as and when i wan as it's the duty of the wife to her husband ----------- Wonder does most local females feel this way too ?? Duty of wife to husband ...

Indonesian Women are indeed more giving to their husband to ensure they do not eat out considering the amount of opportunities available outside that are SYT..

[BustLover]

Originally Posted by Rainman

Indonesian Women are indeed more giving to their husband to ensure they do not eat out considering the amount of opportunities available outside that are SYT..

Most Indonesian women are housewives. Die die must please their men. Singapore women are different; they are working mothers with financial independence. even if they are not working, they may have inherit their parents wealth. How to compare...

[asdfghjkl]

sg women how many can sew and cook one? haiz..

[Frankiestine]

Originally Posted by BustLover

Singapore women are different; they are working mothers with financial independence...even if they are not working, they may have inherit their parents wealth. How to compare...

not forgetting inherit the husband wealth or rather ex husband when they divorce..

[Rainman]

Originally Posted by BustLover

Most Indonesian women are housewives. Die die must please their men. Singapore women are different; they are working mothers with financial independence. even if they are not working, they may have inherit their parents wealth. How to compare...

Not really, working women also same same...