How long did you not have sex with your wife or gf?

[asdfghjkl]

i remember my husband once threw away my favorite pot.. i "punish" him by not giving him for one month..

[cgfreak]

Originally Posted by allyyong

Just pick up a fight with him over me using his handphone...he got paranoid when I used his phone to sms cos I did not have mine around and talked rudely to me...

With all these fucked up behaviour...excuse me???? How to be nice to my hubby? I also helped to pay his loans and bills....and even his fucking clothings...now I am getting all pissed and sore over him cos I am not receiving what I should have.....LOVE AND ATTENTION

Well ,I guess everyone has got their own stories to tell, I think your hubby is a tat too much maybe, but for my case, I guess I am quite a busy guy. I work till late most of the time, but I get nagged at if I dun come home early, I got tonnes of work to do at work. bosses and clients breathing down my neck, and the last thing I need is my gf calling me every half an hour asking me if i am going home soon. I dun really nag at her, but I would just appreciate it more if she could be a bit understanding when I sometimes when I get home, I still need to figure out how to get things solved at work. and during those times, I might be a bit unattentive. hell what am I supposed to do, really? quit my job and work at mcdonalds instead where I dun have to think about anything except if the customer wants a Big Mac or Filet O Fish?

[seedofcucky]

Originally Posted by allyyong

With all these fucked up behaviour...excuse me???? How to be nice to my hubby? I also helped to pay his loans and bills....and even his fucking clothings...now I am getting all pissed and sore over him cos I am not receiving what I should have.....LOVE AND ATTENTION

Love and attention? hmm thats something to be taken note of. I just plucked her armpit hair, and she just pulled my beard....that's personal attention. Occasionally I shave her pussy hair too.

[mscucky]

Originally Posted by allyyong

With all these fucked up behaviour...excuse me???? How to be nice to my hubby? I also helped to pay his loans and bills....and even his fucking clothings...now I am getting all pissed and sore over him cos I am not receiving what I should have.....LOVE AND ATTENTION

u have a choice. but will u make a choice? leave him out of ur life. u can stand by urself without him. else u will have to endure this endless mental torture. he is showing a barbaric n unruly behaviour. with u helping him to pay for his loans and such and servicing his lust and entertaining his childishness, he shud be grateful n start thanking n worshipping god for having u

the fact is, he still is very much unappreciative, inconsiderate and mean. why do u still want to be with him? do u need him ? if he is impotent, poor n sick and can't fulfill u , it's understandable and u shud stand by him. i will support u to be with him....

but so much have given, yet he is still lidat. worth staying?



if u dun mind, may i ask few qns.. why are u staying put? is it coz of the kids? is it coz of love? do u still love him?

if it's coz of love, i may lend u some support coz i understand why u r staying put... hopefully he will change and there's no looking back for u to be with him.....hopefully u can endure and that it's not too late for him to appreciate u.


or maybe if u love him alot, u try to be a bit different. talk nicely to him. if he can't accept that u tell him things or bossy. then do in a consultative and discussive manners. stimes guys stop listening when woman starts yelling and screaming. i always feel that we will hav eto talk nicely to iron out things. dislike very much of screaming and shouting coz problem will not be solved !

make sure ur temper is good before u start discussing with him. count to ten when u r angry. talk when the kids are not around. never argue infront of the kids. and god bless, hopefully u guys will pull tru.

i think to make any relationship work, we will need to learn how to handle them. make up n be loving. marriage has it's ups and downs. not everyone is perfect.

[jaclyn]

tks mscucky for ur complement...

i'm still hanging on bcos of my child.... i dun wan the poor kid to get hurt... as for talking to my husband abt our problem... i've tried... but there's no conclusion made at the end of it...

he did ask for separation... but he only went back to his parent place for a few hours then come back liao... think got scolding from them bah... he oso won't leave me like that lor... he still need me to pay his coming road tax & car insurance which come up to 3k lor.... haiz.... really feel like giving up in life...

[seedofcucky]

Originally Posted by mscucky

u have a choice. but will u make a choice?

wow my mscucky dear, since when have you become a counsellor liao?

[jaclyn]

i agree with sis ally lor... when we wan to be nice to him but when he come back give those kind of attitude how to...

but for me aft awhile i'm ok liao... and wan to compensate him with sex... but he dun even bother... well i'm oso tired aft a day of work... but i'm willing to put in the effort... dunno y he can't lor...

[vistaman]

seems like there are a lot of bros or sis here facing a crisis at home. i am in the same boat too. how long will the misery lasts? things get complicated when there are children.
I also notice that sex isnt the root cause for most cases, its part of it but not the root of it all. communication, understanding, affections, attention, etc are all super important to ensure a good relationship with ones partners.
i dont get any of those from my spouse eventhough i have tried to give her before. well.....those are in the past.sigh! i gave up now.

[BustLover]

Originally Posted by jaclyn

tks mscucky for ur complement...

i'm still hanging on bcos of my child.... i dun wan the poor kid to get hurt... as for talking to my husband abt our problem... i've tried... but there's no conclusion made at the end of it...

he did ask for separation... haiz.... really feel like giving up in life...

Sis Jaclyn, no use trying on a 1-way relationship. My advice to you is to start socializing and to stop paying for his expenses. He had to stand on his own 2 feets. Don't spend any $ on him and see whether he goes down on his knees. Sorry to say, you have a f** hopeless man.

[BustLover]

Originally Posted by Frankiestine

not forgetting inherit the husband wealth or rather ex husband when they divorce..

This probably explain why it is better to have girls than boys...
Remember the 80's SIA advertisement,
"Singapore GALS, you have a GREAT way to FLY..."

[vistaman]

Originally Posted by jaclyn

i agree with sis ally lor... when we wan to be nice to him but when he come back give those kind of attitude how to...

but for me aft awhile i'm ok liao... and wan to compensate him with sex... but he dun even bother... well i'm oso tired aft a day of work... but i'm willing to put in the effort... dunno y he can't lor...

Sis jaclyn. i salute u for your efforts. your hubby is a lucky guy who does not realise it. i guess he thinks the grass is always greener on the other side. He forgot he got a rose at home.
how i wish my spouse would treat me this way. I am almost invisible to her.

[vistaman]

i just came back from a colleagues wedding. the thought that keeps running thru my mind is how long will it last. Of course i wish them the very best but after going thru my own marriage, i just fear for the worst. its getting me to become paranoid and fearful that a true long term marriage is almost impossible or rare.
there are exceptions for sure. my parents are good example, sometimes, i do feel like a big loser compared to them. they may have arguments at times but never ever take it to heart. its like fight then forget. which is kinda nice. no pent up animosity. unlike my wife who will remember forever and ever and ever. she even brings up things that we argued about 5 years ago.
how to start fresh when she takes it to heart. sigh!

[allyyong]

Originally Posted by vistaman

i just came back from a colleagues wedding. the thought that keeps running thru my mind is how long will it last. Of course i wish them the very best but after going thru my own marriage, i just fear for the worst. its getting me to become paranoid and fearful that a true long term marriage is almost impossible or rare.
there are exceptions for sure. my parents are good example, sometimes, i do feel like a big loser compared to them. they may have arguments at times but never ever take it to heart. its like fight then forget. which is kinda nice. no pent up animosity. unlike my wife who will remember forever and ever and ever. she even brings up things that we argued about 5 years ago.
how to start fresh when she takes it to heart. sigh!

Well...Vistaman....gals are a little like that,,..things that happened many donkey years ago, they will and would and ALWAYS remember...hehehe....sometimes I find myself guilty of that.

Anyway, so pissed with him today, he is not home to sleep.I dun know where he is going to sleep and I dun care.

I am not staying put becos I have kids, I have none. I am sure I am not the only one feeling that way, when we married, it's just like "Aiyah, fuck it lah, marry then say...cannot work then talk abt it..." mindset. I want to give up but yet again not strong enough to.....maybe becos of my low self esteem....afraid that no man would want...hehehehehe...

Although I do agree if things really are bad, maybe I shld get out of the relationship.. I dun know...we see how it goes...if a better guy comes along, I would definately pack my bags...in the meantime, I will just hang around...

He has not been buying gifts for me for a long time.... he never writes me any love notes..he never says "I love you"...come to think of it...why the fuck I marry this guy for???

Spicing up things in a relationship is both parties work...if only one does the job..it is damn tiring..I am already damn tired.

Guys out there...u wonder why ur wives are dead fish...spare a thought for them sometimes...it is not about buying gifts..it is abt being attentive to them and being affectionate...S'porean men, most of them, are not tat way...

[x_ylx]

I feel a little scared after reading this thread.

My wife and I met 2 years ago. I thought it would be a short term relationship initially but she fitted me like a hand in glove, and we got hitched a year later.

We stayed together from the start of the relationship as I had an appartment. We bang a lot during the start of our relationship - I think it was almost 5 times a week for 2~3 months. It's good that she's always in the mood for sex. Quickies or slow sensual ones, she likes them all.

However, lately, work has taken its toll on both of us and we are down to 1~2 times a week; Usually, a weekend affair. Sometimes, we even need porn to get us going.

The point is that my wife and I will be trying for a baby next year. After reading this thread, I am really worried that we might end up like many unfortunate souls here especially when I am a very playful type. Occasionally, I still go to ktv and hc. Although I have not met anyone hotter than my wife at these places, I still go there. I guess it is just in a boy's dna to want something new and exciting to play. (Started feeling very guilty and stupid half a year ago and decided that I wouldn't fuck any of these women now. Been restricting it to just handjobs or blowjobs (with cap) when I just want to get "serviced" or just want some excitement.)

If anyone has good advice on how to keep things going (esp appreciate a woman's view) after having a baby, please tell me. Meanwhile, I will just have to keep my fingers crossed, remind myself always that I have a diamond of a woman in my wife already, and pray that we will still fuck like rabits after our baby.

[seesea]

OMG .. Is there any happy couples around here that do not have SEX often but just 1 or 2 times of LOVE making in a month and are more than happy with it (no of times doing it is less due to work ..)??

Makes 1 thinking that marriage is not so gd after a few years down the road ...
Btw , just curious , do u people marry for the sake of marry (due to age) or love !